I've never seen any life transformation that didn't begin with someone being tired of their own bullsh*t. Sounds harsh right? Maybe, but it's also very true.
This can look very different depending on how you choose to live your life or the experiences you have had but it really boils down to being sick and tired of being sick and tired of something. It could be looking in the mirror and not liking the physical aspects of oneself or it may be the constant complaining that has you sick of hearing your own voice. For some, it's just a deep seeded feeling of emptiness with no real name to place to it due to the confusion and pain of what "it" even is. It's just a feeling of being lost and unsure. Whatever the "it" is may not even be your fault but it is and will always be your responsibility to begin your own healing journey.
I know, I was there. Almost eleven years ago, I looked in the mirror and couldn't stand what I saw. My whole being was wrapped around my outer image and I had the thought, if I just lose the weight, I'll be happy......and so I did. Over 100 pounds and 100 inches in less than a year. And though I looked great and received validation and compliments everywhere I went, I was still completely dead inside. The weight on the outside had never been the problem. It was the weight I carried within that was the root cause of it all.
And so it began. The journey to releasing the weight I carried in my heart, my soul, my head. And when I started to peel back the layers of my life and how I chose to feed my entire body emotionally, mentally and physically, I began to notice the changes coming from within. The more I peeled back, the more I learned and the more awareness I had to what I truly needed and wanted in my life. I was no longer lost, I had a sense of purpose and curiosity for what was possible and the weight slowly lifted.
It's a lifelong commitment I have made to myself to love exactly who I am at exactly where I am with compassion for myself every step of the way, even on the days I feel resistance.
Here are a few ways in which you can begin:
We are here for such a short time and we can spend all our time it at war with ourselves or we can learn to fall in love with our experience and love the life we have been gifted. It's a choice and it's yours.
We have been taught or at least heard of in our lifetime that Sunday is meant for a day of rest. I have noticed more and more the evolution of the tagline "Self Care Sunday" popping up in every spiritual group, coaching practice and social media feeds. I have found this a bit misleading in my own world as if somehow only one day is meant for self care and that self care means booking a massage, or lunch with friends, or whatever outward experience makes you feel better.
What if self care became a conscious choice each and every day and we embodied it as an outward AND inward experience? A beautiful balance of taking care of ourselves as well as enjoying the experiences that help support our self care? What would this look like for you?
Examples of how I support my inner self care:
So ask yourself this, what does inner and outer self care look like for me and how can I start taking steps in my everyday to implement what I truly need for alignment and balance?
Don’t ever let a bad day or days trick you into thinking you have a bad life.
We all have experienced them at one point in our life. The days that make us feel inferior, like nothing is going our way no matter what we try to do. The days where we just want to stay in bed and forget it all. The days that feel so hard that we feel they will never end. We go down the rabbit hole looking for all the bad stuff to compile in our heads to justify and confirm that this thought, this belief, is absolute truth.
In my own experience years ago, this became a habitual pattern where I created a belief system around these days believing that because of them my entire life sucked. I got so caught up in the actual days that I was unable to even catch a glimpse of anything good. I was so lost and broken that it was just easier to blame all my stuff on these days instead of taking personal responsibility for owning my part in it. The habit was deep and it was easier to stay there than to begin the process of true change. People would try to point out the good things and I became like a venomous snake ready to defend my belief with a slide presentation in my mind ready to share with all the crap I had in my life to back me up. That was a very hard pill to swallow and took some serious self reflection to begin to change this pattern.
The reflection began when I was introduced to my first book in the self help area. The book was called The Secret, by Rhonda Byrne. Many of you know my profound love for this simple yet powerful book and its concept of The Law of Attraction. It opened the door to beginning my spiritual journey and has become a deep part of my being and teachings. The understanding that we ATTRACT exactly what we ARE in every moment of everyday whether we are conscious of it or not.
You may be asking “But how does this affect me?” Well, it’s simple. Whatever it is you are thinking or doing at any given moment is actually attracting more of that same energy into your life. If you are focusing on all the bad things you will attract more bad things, if you think your life is hard then yes it will feel hard and you will attract more experiences that will confirm this. Now you may be asking, “Well, what can I do about this?”
This is the challenging part. To first accept your role in it and then begin the steps.
Kelly McCarthy is a passionate universal energy teacher, intuitive practitioner and insightful sacred speaker located in Litchfield County, CT. Though not a published author yet, once in awhile she feels called to write about something that speaks to her.